You Don't Bring Me Flowers

You Don't Bring Me Flowers (Barbra Streisand)
I used to hear the song a lot when I was young but never really took notice of it until recently when I borrowed "Barbra: The Concert" VCD, the one that was staged like a 2 act musical (loved this production). Anyway, when I got to the 2nd Act of the concert, I was so moved when she sang this song. I really felt bad, as I listen to every word within the song. It brought me back to that feeling I had with an ex who was so afraid to loose . . .(long story)
Anyway I find this song really tragic . . . the beginning of the song recounts how their relationship turned sour . . . You don't bring me flowers, You don't sing me love songs, You hardly talk to me anymore, When you come through the door at the end of the day . . . And then came the worst part . . . I remember when, You couldn't wait to love me, Used to hate to leave me, Now after lovin' me late at night, When it's good for you and you're feeling all right, Well you just roll over and you turn out the light . . . I find this line so depressing . . . i can just imagine the feeling of being degraded to a mere sex object. anyway, just want to share this song, but i love the song, the melody and the lyrics really goes well together and Barbra sang it really well, i love the solo version though instead of the duet version. . .

[words get in the way]

i realized you're seeing someone new. . .the realization hit me like a bomb, shattering my heart into pieces. . . Another proof that the truth fucking hurts! i don't believe he knows you like i do. . . then came denial, excuses. . . make myself believe that he might be wrong, that soon, he will come to his senses and forget about the other guy for me. your temperamental moody side, the one you're always tryin to hide from me. . .then it hit me, i may not really know him after all. . .am i just pretending to know when you have something on your mind, you've been tryin to tell me for the longest time . . . i guess all the while im just fooling myself, and before you break my heart in two there's something i've been tryin to say to you. . .
but the words got in the way, there's so much i want to say, so much that i don't even know where to start, it seems too big in my head that i can't find the right words and right things to say, it's locked deep inside and if you look in my eyes, we might fall in love again, another sad attempt to win him back. i won't even start to cry, please no, at least leave me with my pride, and before we say goodbye, i guess there's no other way. The saddest part is that i try to say i love you, but the words get in the way. . .
your heart has always been an open door but baby i don't even know you anymore, if i ever knew you at all, and despite the fact it's hurting me, if you only know much it hurts, i know the time has come to set you free. . .

{Moving On}

I guess it's about time that I leave this chapter behind and start anew. I have been sad and gloomy for the longest time and I think I need to find means to dispel this sadness. . . it's killing me. . .
Anyway, I know I have a thousand reasons to be sad but come to think of it, I have a million other reasons to be happy. . . I know this is not an easy task but I know everyone would agree it's the best road to take even if I need to start everything from scratch . . .
My first move: to learn to love myself more. . . I guess I've been trying to give myself to people, try to give everything and too late to realize, I have nothing left for me. . .
Then I need to find my old self, I need to find the fun person I used to be. . . I know he's just there somewhere, I may have just overlooked him but I have this feeling I'm gonna find him.
Next move, I have to go home, 'coz I feel so sleepy and it's been an hour since my shift ended and my eyes are so tired from staring at the monitor. . .